FIFTY SHADES OF LOVE
So I guess by now you know how much I love reading and watching movies. With my hectic, crazy, frantic life, having a two-and-a-half-hour escape into someone else’s fantasy world is just enough to help me unwind. But as much as I’d love to switch my brain off during those brief moments of escape and just be – thinking and feeling nothing – it doesn’t work. I’m just not wired that way. Much to my chagrin, my mind didn’t come with an off switch, which means I analyze everything all the time, even fictional movies and stories.
Another confession. I read Fifty Shades of Grey or at least part of it. I wanted to see what all the hoopla was about. I wanted to better understand what was influencing the young ladies I taught. I wanted to better appreciate what was so appealing to young, single women, married women with children, and Christian women, no less. And, as much as I love to read and can generally get through most books pretty quickly, this one I could not. I just couldn’t finish it. Not because I’m a prude, but because I felt so sorry for the main character and her warped views about love. In addition, my analytical brain couldn’t stop wondering what message this book and movie (like so many others out there) was sending to the world about true love.
Scripture
I John 4:8 – Anyone who does not love does not know God because God is love.
I John 4:16 – So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him.
Lessons Learned
The world has taken something defined, ordained, and sanctified by God and has made it twisted and convoluted and these skewed ideas, images, and practices have begun to rewire our thought patterns. These warped perceptions are becoming so entrenched in our values and belief systems that we no longer know true love. We no longer know how to love or be loved, and more tragically, we then project these false attributes and beliefs onto God. We’re becoming so comfortable dwelling in the shades of grey – love is conditional, love hurts, love is temporary – that we no longer recognize the simple black and white of the matter. God is love; He loves us more than we can ever imagine, and because of His love for us and in us, we can love others as He designed.
Lessons Lived
Before we can genuinely comprehend what it means to love ourselves and to love others unconditionally, we must first recognize what, or more accurately, Who love is. I John 4:8 states that God is love. I must’ve read this verse a thousand times. But it wasn’t until I began “analyzing” the concept of love that it struck me in a whole new way. The verse didn’t say that God is loving or lovable. It said that God IS love. So rereading I Corinthians 13 for the thousandth time, I also gained new insights and meaning. If God and Love are synonymous, then could that passage be read this way:
If I speak in the tongues of men or of angels, but do not have God, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but do not have God, I am nothing. If I give all I possess to the poor and give over my body to hardship that I may boast but do not have God, I gain nothing.
God is patient, God is kind. He does not envy, He does not boast, He is not proud. He does not dishonor others, He is not self-seeking, He is not easily angered, He keeps no record of wrongs. God does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. He always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. God never fails.
Are you excited yet, because I am! When I begin to appreciate just how magnanimous, wondrous, marvelous, perfect, and great our God is, I can’t help but rejoice! See, when we dwell in the “shades of grey” where our understanding of love is mystified, misled, and muddled, it’s easy for us to fall prey to the world’s definitions of love. But when we comprehend Who God Is, we will realize that true love exists after all. True Love that endures in the good and the bad. True love that is gentle and kind and warm. True love that is all-consuming and big enough to support my mistakes, hurt, fears, and many flaws. True love that reassures that I, that you, that we, can love and be loved.
I’m so glad that with God, my Fifty Shades of Grey are covered by His Fifty Shades of Grace. Grace sufficient enough to accept me as I am. Grace ample enough to cover my sins and hide my imperfections while molding me and shaping me into the me I was designed and am destined to be. I am Fifty Shades of Grateful, knowing that God is love and that Love dwells in me, bubbles over and impacts others, wrapping us all in a warm, soft, gentle blanket of Love.
Reflections
- How do the texts I John 4:8 and I John 4:16 speak to you?
- What books, movies, and/or experiences helped to shape your understanding of love? In what ways?
- How does the biblical meaning of love compare to society’s definition of love?
- How does the revised reading of I Corinthians 13:1-8 speak to you?
- How do you define unconditional love?
- What are your thoughts about the idea that God and Love are one? How might this impact your perception of Who God is and what Love means?
- What are your personal LIFE Lessons?
- Liberation: What new insights have you gained that have freed you from past thoughts or practices?
- Inspiration: In what ways have you been spiritually, emotionally or mentally motivated to live for Christ?
- Fortification: What additional scriptural texts, passages or stories can reinforce and strengthen you against the attacks of the enemy?
- Edification: How might you share your story to edify others and bring glory to God?
Playlist
As you process, digest, and apply what’s been shared, here are a few songs from my “Totally SUBMITted” Playlist. Listen and let the music infiltrate your soul. Read the lyrics and let the words encourage you. And I pray that you’ll be blessed as I was.
- Lover of My Soul by Jonathan McReynolds – Jonathan McReynolds – Lover Of My Soul (AUDIO ONLY)
Prayer
Dear Heavenly Father, I come before You today an empty vessel, longing to be filled with Your Holy Spirit. Teach me to love as You have loved me. Help me keep Your Word so that I may experience the love of the Father forevermore (John 14:23). Thank you for the gift of forgiveness, for even a sinner like me (Romans 5:8), and I pray that nothing – not death nor life, nor angels nor rulers, nor things present nor things to come, nor powers, nor height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation – separate me from your love (Romans 8:38). In Your Most Holy Name, I pray, Amen.
